Growing older..

I’ve always considered myself as a fairly youngish thinking individual and I’ve always had to remind myself of my age at times too – perhaps these are the times when Peter Pan and Old Father Time clash internally to produce those incidences where a review of life so far and a sudden, personal reality check seem to occur simultaneously.

When I think about where the years have gone, seemingly so quickly and when I consider all the people I’ve known as relatives, friends, work colleagues and neighbours that have died, moved on or I’ve just simply forgotten about, I occasionally  feel overwhelmed by the volume of memories but also cheated because in some instances I didn’t make the best of some of those relationships – it’s only a brief period of  negative and introspective reflection before I return to a normal and functional blasé though.

Of course I’m fully aware subconsciously that I’m getting older, fortunately I’ve enjoyed good health and which I’ve admittedly taken for granted even when I’ve seen others struck down cruelly and prematurely – it’s the old ‘it won’t happen to me’ syndrome at work, a form of self protecting denial I suppose.

People of a certain maturity seem to be either described as ‘old before their time’ or as ‘not acting their age’ – neither is a flattering representation, but I think I’d sooner be included in the latter group than the former.

AJB

 

Spilling over from the real world (blogging)..

I find that blogging is a compulsion, a distraction, a joy, a chore, a release, a catharsis ..it’s each of one of those and some days it’s several.

I see blogging as talking things over aloud with my self, but in a very large, crowded room where the general hullabaloo will drown out my voice so I won’t be heard and so there’s no inhibition of sounding like or being called a fool.

Yes, I know all my words are there to see, but when and if a passer by comments, disagrees, takes offence, agrees with me or is made comatose by the content, I probably won’t be present at the time.

Anyway we will see over time 🙂